I’ve been in Yarl’s Wood for 9 months. A few days ago tried to kill my self. I put something the around my neck, I was unconscious my friend found me. My friend self harmed when she saw me. The officers instead of helping us they locked us up healthcare and then about 20 officers (only two women) came to take us to the block using force. They twisted our arms and held our neck down and took us. A male officer held me down and a female officer put their hands in my knickers to get my phone so I couldn’t tell anyone what was happening to me. They did similar to my friend. We were so scared.

I’ve had 6 bail hearings and they are all rejected on stupid points. I was trafficked in my country. I am scared of these people so much. How can they go in my knickers in front of male officers? I am so stressed.

A male officer tried to search me once. I told him not to come near me three times. But he didn’t stop so I punched him and gave him a bruise. The police came and they took me to court and the judge fined me £15. I feel like they sexual assaulted me. They can do anything.

We need support, we need mental health help but they just put us in the block with a metal toilet. They just threaten us with the block.

What’s going on is very terrible, it’s very bad. For instance, I’m very ill – I have high blood pressure. They checked me its 200 over 134. I couldn’t walk and they’re keeping me here. Every time they say you are pretending. The health care people say you are pretending. They are very very bad people. Everything you tell them they think you are trying not to go back. They don’t believe it. They keep adding to my medication, they add more but its not coming down. They keep adding more. It’s not good for me – it gives me headaches. I told them and they didn’t say anything. They stay stop thinking, because I am stressed. They say lie down – how can I do that. Here I don’t have anyone apart from your room mate to help me.

Today we have one lady from Ghana. She is very ill she doesn’t know what’s going on. I think she’s mentally tortured or something. She can’t speak for herself. She doesn’t know what is going on now. A lot of people are going tonight. 10:30 tonight and they are already going to reception. I think it’s terminal 5 in heathrow that they are going.

Around 2 o’clock we started to pray to ask whether they should stop taking them. We wanted to do protests with those who have got tickets. Another lady from another room has cancer and she’s gone to hospital and they handcuffed her to go to hospital – a person with cancer.

I’m not feeling good. I can’t talk.

One of our friends who is not well is being taken to a charter flight to Ghana. She’s not fit to fly – she doesn’t even know where she is. Everybody is saying why are they taken her. She is in the reception at the moment. We are waiting to see what happens. There is a protest because of her, everybody gathered in the corridor. I was with her when they called. Two officers came and said she had to go to immigration. She can’t speak for herself, she can’t even recognise her friends. There were about 40 something people in the corridor and then we came to the garden. We were talking to the officers saying that this is nor fair, this is not justice.

There are a lot of people on this charter flight, they are taking 20 people. There are people being taken that are sick.

Yesterday we went to another unit of to get sanitary towels from a woman officer. When we came back the male officer said “what is in your pocket” and he said he needed to search us and that we had stolen the sanitary towels and he was angry. But they are free so we didn’t understand why he was saying this. I went to my room, I was so stressed out. Why is it his business if we have period or not have period? If we need the sanitary towels we will have them. It’s not normal to have to show him. Where is our human rights?

We are stressed out about everything. This was a big deal – accusing us of stealing the sanitary towels in front of all the residents. We felt stressed and we self harmed – it was embarrassing. They said they would put us in Kingfisher which is the block. Another said “where is your dog friend?” – maybe because she is small, I don’t know. In front of everyone they said we had to put the sanitary towels back. Because we were upset, he said never come to me if you need help. He took my cross from my room and won’t give it back. They say that I can harm with the cross. In my religion I am orthodox so I don’t like when people touch the cross, it gives negative energy.

I refused to board because I did not get medical treatment for a serious complaint. A man and a woman guard took me to hospital where I had to undress for screening. I didn’t mind the woman guard being there but the man would not leave. I complained about lack of privacy to my solicitor in writing and tried to reach him by phone, but he has never responded.

We are living in constant fear not knowing what is going to happen even in the next few minutes! After the Channel 4 exposure – officers were still being rude, opening doors without knocking – one barged into my room while I was getting dressed- I challenged him but he claimed wasn’t looking and just stood at the door. It happened again recently with another officer – but he left when I screamed. Officers constantly demean us and make us feel worthless.