I’ve been in Yarl’s Wood for 9 months. A few days ago tried to kill my self. I put something the around my neck, I was unconscious my friend found me. My friend self harmed when she saw me. The officers instead of helping us they locked us up healthcare and then about 20 officers (only two women) came to take us to the block using force. They twisted our arms and held our neck down and took us. A male officer held me down and a female officer put their hands in my knickers to get my phone so I couldn’t tell anyone what was happening to me. They did similar to my friend. We were so scared.
I’ve had 6 bail hearings and they are all rejected on stupid points. I was trafficked in my country. I am scared of these people so much. How can they go in my knickers in front of male officers? I am so stressed.
A male officer tried to search me once. I told him not to come near me three times. But he didn’t stop so I punched him and gave him a bruise. The police came and they took me to court and the judge fined me £15. I feel like they sexual assaulted me. They can do anything.
We need support, we need mental health help but they just put us in the block with a metal toilet. They just threaten us with the block.
Lots of detainees here are don’t have a valid passport and so cannot be removed. After interview with High Commission for a travel document it takes a long time, about 3 months 4 months or 5 months. That’s why detainees apply to court for bail. I do not have a valid passport, my travel document is not ready. My removal is not imminent. It is taking a long time and I’m in detention for more than 4 months. That’s why before the bail hearing Home Office serves you a Fake Ticket. The Judge takes advantage, your ticket already your and your bail is REFUSED. After a week I will cancel the Ticket with judicial review, because High Commission don’t serve Travel Document.
The judge says why are your applying for bail because your ticket is ready, but my travel document is not ready, they gave it before. The Home Office and the court are playing a big game. After a lot of detainee’s tickets are cancelled, the officer say sorry its Home Office mistake but we don’t get bail.
The day before yesterday Immigration gave me a ticket and I heard from the court. They’ve given me 28 days to appeal to the civil court. Before that finished – I still have 18 days and they’ve already given me a ticket. I said this is unfair, there is not time. I told the officer and the solicitor. And still no reply. Legally, under the law I have 28 days for appeal and I should be ready in 28 days. It’s up to me, because they’ve given me time. I’m thinking it’s not fair, it’s racism. It a conspiracy against all the detained people. I should be here for the time. There are many people here: there are thousands of people and there are thousads of problems. The main problem is a conspiracy from immigration. If you go according to the law, and you go along the process. They still always make trouble for you. They make it more negative than it should be. When I was interviewed they said do short answers only, they were not listening to me from the start. That makes problems for us because it’s not explained there. when they wrote the writing and he gives the copy to us, when we tried to read it and we can’t read it because of the handwriting. The person in the library in the detention centre said she couldn’t read it. She said this is the immigration language. But the immigration language should be for the humans, not for immigration only. They are always talking about that first interview that was very short and very unfair and I have tried to explain but no one is listening to me.
I was going to interview. There was another guy and they were deporting him. And they were forcing him because he didn’t want to go. He was handcuffed and they were forcing. The officer made us go the other way so I don’t know what happened.
The staff here in the centre, they can not take care of people. They give us rice and chicken several times every day. The food makes you ill. And it takes 2 months before you can get an appointment even with the health unit, even if you feel really ill. It is just ridiculous. And when you get to see a doctor, they do nothing. They just give you painkillers for everything, even if you had cancer. They do not treat you as people but like animals. A few days ago I was really ill. So my roomate called the ambulance. I was lying on the floor, almost dead. But the people who run the centre told the ambulance to leave again and told them I am ok. They did not help me at all. If anyone would see what is going on in the centre, they would see that they do not treat us as humans.
I have a charter flight tomorrow. Even though I have a partner in this country who is British but they just say that I am lying, even though my partner came to testify in court. They gave me a ticket to the charter flight, even though they should not give removal directions to anyone who has a pending application. I tried to send my letter to Croydon but the detention centre hid it and prevented it from going out to Croydon so they never received it. So then my partner printed it out and sent it to them and they finally received it but much too late. They hide all my post and I cannot send out any post. I just spoke to Croydon and they finally received my post and sent a letter to the home office to update my information. If I could receive and send post, I would be able to help my case but the
centre opens my post and hides it from me and they only give me some of the papers I should receive. The same happens to most of the people here. The centre does not waste any time to give people their post on time even though that is really important. I got my judicial review in, so hopefully I should not have to get on that charter flight and be removed, however I am not sure what is happening.
I have been in detention for one year. I never committed any crime I just overstayed my visa. My partner is also ill and she is suffering from severe physical and mental illnesses and I can not help her much while I am in here.
My partner came this week to see me because she knows about my removal orders and never knows if I will be removed or not.
It’s not going well at all. It’s very sad. There is this lady here, she’s been here for 5 or 6 months. She’s not well, she’s got mental health problems. She can’t even recognise herself. And they are taking on the flight. She friends and her husband is here.
It’s very serious in here. It’s not easy at all. It’s very hard. A lot of us are going mental. We are inside, you can’t talk, you can’t do anything for yourself. Some of us were in prostitution. And we got here because we didn’t want to do it. I got an id to work and they caught me and put me in prison. I then came to ask for asylum and they put me in Yarls Wood. I’ve applied for bail, 5 6 7 times and they turn me all down. I don’t know what I have done. They just make sure that everyone gets away from you. The food is not good. It takes ages to see a doctor even if you are dying. This is serious. I just don’t want to go to prostitution. What I have done? I can’t even think straight. I have been in prison and yarls wood for 18 months. My partner is out there. This is serious. It’s really, really serious. Why can’t I fight my case from the outside.
What’s going on is very terrible, it’s very bad. For instance, I’m very ill – I have high blood pressure. They checked me its 200 over 134. I couldn’t walk and they’re keeping me here. Every time they say you are pretending. The health care people say you are pretending. They are very very bad people. Everything you tell them they think you are trying not to go back. They don’t believe it. They keep adding to my medication, they add more but its not coming down. They keep adding more. It’s not good for me – it gives me headaches. I told them and they didn’t say anything. They stay stop thinking, because I am stressed. They say lie down – how can I do that. Here I don’t have anyone apart from your room mate to help me.
Today we have one lady from Ghana. She is very ill she doesn’t know what’s going on. I think she’s mentally tortured or something. She can’t speak for herself. She doesn’t know what is going on now. A lot of people are going tonight. 10:30 tonight and they are already going to reception. I think it’s terminal 5 in heathrow that they are going.
Around 2 o’clock we started to pray to ask whether they should stop taking them. We wanted to do protests with those who have got tickets. Another lady from another room has cancer and she’s gone to hospital and they handcuffed her to go to hospital – a person with cancer.
I’m not feeling good. I can’t talk.
One of our friends who is not well is being taken to a charter flight to Ghana. She’s not fit to fly – she doesn’t even know where she is. Everybody is saying why are they taken her. She is in the reception at the moment. We are waiting to see what happens. There is a protest because of her, everybody gathered in the corridor. I was with her when they called. Two officers came and said she had to go to immigration. She can’t speak for herself, she can’t even recognise her friends. There were about 40 something people in the corridor and then we came to the garden. We were talking to the officers saying that this is nor fair, this is not justice.
There are a lot of people on this charter flight, they are taking 20 people. There are people being taken that are sick.
Yesterday we went to another unit of to get sanitary towels from a woman officer. When we came back the male officer said “what is in your pocket” and he said he needed to search us and that we had stolen the sanitary towels and he was angry. But they are free so we didn’t understand why he was saying this. I went to my room, I was so stressed out. Why is it his business if we have period or not have period? If we need the sanitary towels we will have them. It’s not normal to have to show him. Where is our human rights?
We are stressed out about everything. This was a big deal – accusing us of stealing the sanitary towels in front of all the residents. We felt stressed and we self harmed – it was embarrassing. They said they would put us in Kingfisher which is the block. Another said “where is your dog friend?” – maybe because she is small, I don’t know. In front of everyone they said we had to put the sanitary towels back. Because we were upset, he said never come to me if you need help. He took my cross from my room and won’t give it back. They say that I can harm with the cross. In my religion I am orthodox so I don’t like when people touch the cross, it gives negative energy.
I produced a letter for Luna House that I got depression- and they referred me to counselling, and then they didn’t give it back to me- it’s there in the Home Office. I have been detained now I am on fast-track. I have a partner-she is pregnant. I was suffering from stress and everything and I can not properly sleep. You know, lot’s of problems are here. I tried to find the GP nine times, ten times, and they gave me the doctor- again yesterday I had the nurse. And I said I am sweating at night-time, and the way she talked to me was very rude. She told me I am making stories- she said I am going to put you in lock up, and you cannot go outside. I am depressed and I have a lot of problems going around my head. And she told me everyting- I will lock up you…and I have problems- I cannot work in Sri Lanka. I came to here as children. I had a relationship with a member of parliament, because of that issue I can’t return. They didn’t treat me properly.
I want to get my NHS number- it is inside my luggage; they took everything when I came here. When I came here I tried to get all my important documents and it’s been two weekends. And they haven’t give me. I come in the evening and they said come in the morning; I come in the morning and they said come in the evening. They treat us like foreign dogs- they are not caring about us. How can we spend the proper time for our applications? My English is not very good. Yesterday- the way she told me I was very upset. I was hunger-striking, I was protesting. I got TB in 2012- I had medication from 1 year and I have side-effects. I have diabetes and now I have depression. I hate this building. Two times they refused me- they want me to bring a GP letter, and I take a GP letter, and I say I have depression and they put me here. My partner is upset because I am here. She is pregnant and nobody is supporting for her. She is coming tomorrow. I am very scared- you can’t believe that your baby, or something like that…I can’t understand…I get very upset I feel very upset mentally. Couselling. The word counselling…when I was coming here, I was not like this. I am like a crazy person. I can’t even think, everything, because of this illness.
If you put people here; people will get mad. My partner is outside in my house- and my baby is going to come in August. She is having abdominal pains, and she can’t do anything- she can’t give a bath to our babies, and the shower stopped working. My lawyer is also…today he didn’t call me. Not I am trying to get my NHS number. All this- everything is mad here. I was not like this before, I used to work as a support worker with people with learning difficulties in July. Now I can’t concentrate- now language, everything I am forgetting because of this. I am getting angry with the people very, very, very soon. I have got depression in here- I don’t know what is the law. I don’t know if I talk about these it is going to do anything.
Yesterday in the morning I went to wash my big sheet because I had been sweating. They said no washing powder in the morning. I have nail problems because I am biting my nails because of the stress. I tried to open my locker and I damaged my hands. I told the doctor I could not sleep and he just gave me a plaster. Another time I went to get a plaster and they made me wait for one hour. The officer came and said, come another ten or fifteen minutes later. I didn’t go back there again. Today I asked them to come and open my locker- they still didn’t come. And I had to find a steel fork to open my locker, and I took my stuff outside. I am getting angry with my partner very quickly.
I am losing my mind.
I refused to board because I did not get medical treatment for a serious complaint. A man and a woman guard took me to hospital where I had to undress for screening. I didn’t mind the woman guard being there but the man would not leave. I complained about lack of privacy to my solicitor in writing and tried to reach him by phone, but he has never responded.
We are living in constant fear not knowing what is going to happen even in the next few minutes! After the Channel 4 exposure – officers were still being rude, opening doors without knocking – one barged into my room while I was getting dressed- I challenged him but he claimed wasn’t looking and just stood at the door. It happened again recently with another officer – but he left when I screamed. Officers constantly demean us and make us feel worthless.