I can honestly say I have never felt so alone and hopeless in my life, but I have never felt such anger either.

We are still traumatised due to yesterday’s events, I can’t tell you how unsettling this is, I haven’t spoken to a single officer today and I don’t see how I can, I can’t even look them in the eyes, I just keep thinking “I wonder which one of you is going to put their hands on me” after what I saw last night I keep having flashbacks, I feel guilty like I should have done something more, it was very tense and I thought it was going to kick off at one point, we were crying shouting at the officers to let her go, and they were shouting in our faces and threatening us. I can’t get that image of her strapped like a Guantanamo inmate out of my mind.

I have never felt so vulnerable in my life and I have been in some shitty situations, I’m so anxious I can’t relax, it’s like I’m in the wolf’s den and I will get eaten eventually, I don’t know what is worse, the anticipation of the event or the event itself.

I can honestly say I have never felt so alone and hopeless in my life, but I have never felt such anger either.

I hope we can all stick together and stop this happening again, all detainees should stop being afraid, or use that fear to fight for their own and each other’s survival.

We have to make a stand for not just our rights but for what is right.

Unity and Solidarity is what will make the difference.

They put her in handcuffs.

There is a problem. There is a woman who has been in Yarl’s Wood for a year. She was in the kitchen all day working. They told her nothing.

Tonight, 7 male officers came to take her. They put her in handcuffs. It was very violent. She cried. She cried so much.  She was shouting help me, help me, help me.

Everybody jumped from their rooms into the corridor. We went to the door.  We said “go away leave the girl alone”. The officers were shouting back at us. The officers were saying “What the fuck are you doing? Go in your rooms. Shut your mouths.” They talk like that, you understand. It’s not funny. What is wrong with people here. We said why are you being rude to us, like the gestapo. They bully, bully bully you. It’s not nice. It’s violent, it’s very violent.

Why are we not allowed phones with cameras in here? They are hiding something you know, they are guilty. And they feel guilty because they are hiding something.

I hope the Stansted 15 know that we are with them in spirit

I am confident that I speak for all detainees and not just those here in Yarl’s Wood when I say how terribly aggrieved we are at the prosecution of the Stansted 15.

The severity of the charges and the lengthy sentences they face are hard to accept and troubles me personally and I can only hope that justice will prevail in this matter.

Their actions did not cause any loss of life or damage to property yet the sentences they face are graver than say a drink driver who mows down a child, or a rapist would face.

All they did was bring attention to an unjust practice which still continues to be practiced by the Home Office.

Although I am shocked by this it is sad to say that I am not surprised, and as I have said before, because the home office acts with impunity regarding immigrants, their actions will trickle down to other parts of society and I am truly fearful for the liberty of all.

I hope the Stansted 15 know that we are with them in spirit, we appreciate all they have done and it is because of principled people like them that all advancements are made regarding human rights and civil liberties, and being oppressed by the powers that be is standard procedure in these cases as history has proven time and again.

I feel a kinship with them because of what they are going through and I understand completely how they feel and no matter what happens they are all going to fine. I know they must be strong people because their actions prove that.

I hope that justice prevails and your liberty remains intact so that you can continue in your noble fight for the liberty of others.

Stay Strong

You are a true inspiration

Love, Solidarity and gratitude from the Yarl’s Wood Strikers

They even restrained her legs because she started to cry

I am so grateful to Diane Abbott and others who helped to stop the deportation of my friend who was snatched from us without warning on Friday.

Although I am so glad she is back as she is dear to me and I was afraid of what might happen to her in ********, I am still afraid after hearing how she was taken.

She told me how after being summoned to healthcare, she saw the doctor because she was still not eating, and then straight from there they took her to the segregation unit which is directly outside healthcare, where she had no phone until much later when officers retrieved it from her room along with all her belongings, not that it did any good as there is no signal and she couldn’t contact anyone. But most shocking is that she was fully restrained from the segregation unit up until the deportation was cancelled. What I don’t understand is that she is 5f2 very thin and frail, as well as being one of the most passive pacifists I have ever met and she did not resist.

They even restrained her legs because she started to cry.

I am so terrified I can’t imagine how she felt, literally tied like a sacrificial lamb to the slaughter.

I dread my turn and it will come, I am more afraid than ever and there is nothing I can do but be detained and have this threat over my like a guillotine.

There has to be a better way.

For most of us it is a fight for life as we know it, if not for life itself

Today has been a very emotional day for me personally,

I am struggling to see anyone in healthcare here in Yarl’s Wood and even going to get my anti-depressants is a struggle now as I just don’t feel I can have any sort of contact with the healthcare staff as I feel vulnerable when I do and I can’t make myself vulnerable in that environment.

So that being said one of my dear friends and fellow activist was segregated today, this is what they do now before you are deported, and even though she is still here I fear she might be lost to me forever.

One faint ray on sunshine is that Stuart McDonald and hopefully Yvette Cooper are visiting us today and we, though diminished in number, are still very grateful for the opportunity to speak with members of the select committee.

We want to know if anything is being done regarding our plight but I also need to know if the Home Office will be held to account for their oppressive treatment of detainees, and when will it’s practices be regularised by a truly independent body, it cannot be allowed to continue it’s immoral and even illegal practices with impunity any longer.

A serious investigation needs to take place into how the Home Office choose to interpret policy and how it enforces these policies, but ideally we would like a clear change in policy with no room for interpretation because our very lives are affected by this bureaucratic administrative body.

I speak for myself and many others when I say the situation for us is getting worse, we are not coping with the constant pressures on us and how can we fight our cases in this sorry state. For most of us it is a fight for life as we know it, if not for life itself.

It is this reality, this desperation I face and deal with every day, not to mention my own personal hell that is dealing with my own case, from the purgatory that is Yarl’s Wood.

I worry about what is happening to her I hope she is safe. It’s really bothering me.

I keep thinking about my friend *****,

She was deported to India on Saturday, after escaping her family who were persecuting her because she wouldn’t agree to a forced marriage and married for love instead and out of cast. She suffered terrible abuse before escaping to Britain. She studied and worked here for 7 years, she made a life for herself here and even though she was abandoned by her husband she did ok here.

She wanted to claim asylum but was given bad legal advice and withdrew her claim as she was told to claim asylum when you are being removed and instead the lawyer took her money for other applications which were bound to be unsuccessful.

When she tried to claim asylum before she was removed they told her that she could not, is that even legal? Who knows what’s legal anymore? I certainly don’t.

I worry about what is happening to her I hope she is safe. It’s really bothering me.

It shook me up real bad.

It shook me up real bad.

What goes on inside here, no one knows. People think it’s okay. I don’t even know where to start.

I was detained in May, I came here from court. I was in prison for 2 and half years for drug offences but they never served me a deportation order or a ticket. My solicitor said I should not enter a detention centre. I was due to be released but they just said I’m going to be detained and gave me no reason for me to be detained. They know I’m a married man, they know I’ve got kids in the UK. My wife is a full-time dental nurse. They’ve seen everything. I’ve been the UK for 17 years, I have never left the UK since I’ve been here. I was fifteen when I came, my mum and dad died when I was young and I was brought here by my auntie. My wife was looking forward to me to come home but right now she’s stressed out.

This place is disgusting. It’s nasty. It’s got loads of bed bugs. There are people slicing themselves with blades. The food is not good. This is not a place to lock up no-one. It’s unclean. People are taking drugs like its outside. Yesterday, they moved a guy out – and he took a picture with his phone – and then they shifted him out of the prison. I can’t sleep properly in the night time because there’s stuff always going on.

The other day, there was a man who was 55 years old. He came to me for help to find a solicitor. He said he was in detention for 14 months. He said he was getting ill-treated. He has no one in Jamaica – no family, no connections at all. They gave him a plane ticket and they came after him. While he was being removed, he dialled my number and I spoke to him while he was on the plane. He was handcuffed. They was beating him all the way to the flight and on the plane. He was saying oh please, crying out. And the guard was saying oh just calm down. And he was screaming. I could hear him crying. Even my eye’s had water in it. He was a nice man, you know.

He said to me that they had a syringe. That there was a guy standing there ready to jab him. He started to slur his words. He was on Virgin Airlines. This is Richard Branson’s company.

A custody officer was standing by me when I was listening to it on the phone. She was saying oh my god. She was feeling so bad she said she would leave her job.

That man is back in Jamaica right now. He has no clothes, no shoes on his feet. He had no money. He was crying and he was begging, saying please help me. And I’m an inmate myself, I couldn’t help him.

These are people that have got kids and family ties in this country. They aren’t taking this into consideration when they try to deport you.

When I first came Britain wasn’t like this. Immigration are doing dirtywork. The Home Office is trying to deny that they know that people are harmed when you’re deported.

The Home office need to be investigated. People need to protest against them.

The treatment of the people here, it will shock

The treatment of the people here, it will shock.

They want to send me to the country where I have taken finger prints. They have kept me in here for 50 days. I went to the police station to ask for help, and they locked me up and put me here.

The Dublin Rules, I am ready to follow them but they don’t follow the rules for everyone. It is different for every person. I came through Europe, if they catch me for this reason then deport me. I have no hope left in this country. I become different, I don’t know who I am. I start to believe I am criminal because I am here. I am full of depress. I can be strong enough. I spend one year to come to this country. I tried to come officially but there wasn’t an official way. I lost my time, I lost my life, I lost my family. I came for a future. People come for this. They are thinking about us wrongly. They are doing what ever they want with us. I complain in my country, which is why I run from from my country. But I didn’t leave my country to come to one without human rights. But this is happening to so many people, this cannot happen.

I have a friend, they are saying to him, ‘We will deport you, we will deport you’ and after 6 months he goes crazy. He says, ‘If you want to deport me I’m ready, I don’t want to stay in this country like this.’ But they still don’t deport him. This happens to so many people – they don’t want us in this country but they don’t deport us.

I try to complain but it was to the manager to G4S. They say you must wait for your answer but the Home Office and Immigration are the same. You write them, but they don’t answer. How long you going to wait? 3 months, 4 months? I cannot complain because I am not from here. What can I tell them? I have no papers. They talk about democracy but it isn’t human, they are not human rights.

Home Office they say Afghani people have not problem in their country. They don’t believe us. I go to the doctor and they say it’s fine and give me paracetamol. Like I come to the doctor for paracetamol. I have a real problem. If you are vegetarian everyday you have rice and potatoes. Its ok, I am vegan that is my choice. I don’t complain but it isn’t right.

The person I share the room with, he has heart problem. He asks for the doctor but the doctor didn’t come from one hour. ‘Your heart is normal, it is healthy.’ They need to treat people with heart problems seriously. They treat us like animals, worse than animals. They treat animals better than us.

In this place many things will happen here but how will people know? We are behind the walls, they cannot see it. It will shock you. 15 hours lock up every day. It is not detention centre it is prison for us.

If that is not a conspiracy, then what is?

PLEASE PUBLISH AND PASS THIS TO ALL:

My name is X

The Maurtian Embassy has been bribed by the Home Office in issuing a travel document in the name of X with my photograph – The elections are looming and the Home Office is trying to clear their backlog of foreign criminals by removing them to wherever possible and by all means.

At 14.30, I was visited by 4 immigration officials (2 male and 2 females). One of the officials, Bev is an immigration manager at Yarl’s Wood IRC – she informed me that one of the male official and the other female official are colleagues – she did not provide their names and she did not introduce me to the other gentleman.

Bev addressed me as X, I corrected her and stated that my name is X. I was asked to sit in a room whilst the 4 of them conversed outside the door – with the door shut.

All of the sudden, the door opened and one of the male officials opened the door and started speaking in a foreign language. I told him my name and told him that I was not understanding what he was saying. It went on for a minute and I told him 3 times in a frustrated tone that I was not understanding him. And as quick as he came in, he left – however, this time he forgot to close the door and I could overhear their conversation.

He told them that it was a done deal as he will state in his report that “her eyes understood what I was saying and that I had a visual”. He told his 3 other conspirators that he will be sending his report asap and that together we’ll remove her. They all knew each other very well.

The other 3 conspirators asked him “how quickly?” and he replied by Wednesday next week. Bev added that to protect themselves and just in case I make a fuss or become unwell, they will have officers escorting me and medics on board.

Bev saw the 3 officials out and returned to the room. Bev told me that the male who spoke in a foreign language is in fact an official from the Maurtian Embassy and that his name is Yaaseen Handsrod. I told her that I overheard their conversation – she blushed at the unexpected comment and stated that she was unsure of what was said.

How can the Maurtian Embassy issue a document on the basis of a visual or “her eyes understood what he was saying..”. He never asked any questions and never checked my accent, her did not ask for up to date photographs nor fingerprints or DNA. If that is not a conspiracy, then what is?

I AM NOT FROM MAURITIUS. I BORN IN LIBERIA AND LIVED MOST OF MY LIFE IN THE UK. I WILL DIE IN LIBERIA OR THE UK.

Regards,
X