To Wonderful People On planet earth!

To Wonderful People On planet earth!

First and foremost, I want to say thank you for your love, cares, supports, solidarity, voices and devotions. I am in great spirit today, seeing you all united for us, detainees here at Yarl’s Wood. Thank you very much.

After watching the BBC Parliamentary News a few days ago, chaired by Yvette Cooper with her interrogations which i sincerely appreciated. For those excellent and important questioning to the CEO’s Centre managers, HMPPS, especially to Julia Roger, Rupert Soames whom they have no answers that are consistent. Detainees such as me are disregarded, overlooked, there was a young lady amongst the audience, who can sincerely tell the world at large, if permitted the torment of individuals here in Yarl’s Wood, I am not a killer neither am I a terrorist.

Mercy should always triumph over Judgement, all we are saying as the voices of detainees is simply that at least amnesty should be granted for those who have made their lives here, and with children and have lived in the UK for at least five years and above.

Can you also believe that for the past three weeks we have no network on our individual phone, thus we can not call nor receive calls. It is that bad.

 

Here below is a little introduction to my own particular case.

My name is ****, I am presently in Yarl’s Wood detention centre. I have a rule 35, which  I am an adult at risk level 2, I’m disabled, with various health issues, my mobility is restricted. While I was in prison, I was better treated and my needs were met. I had occupational therapist, social worker and hospital consultants inputs. But since being here in Yarl’s Wood, you are treated as non-existent.

Further more, I am a victim of torture, domestic violence abuse, abandoned and forsaken for my sexuality, I am a mother also to my wonderful children whom are all born in the UK, British Citizens, and four of them has individual health challenges which put them under alot of medical;y traumatic situation. For example: wheelchair bound due to SMA and Sickle Anaemia, the youngest one has sickle cell anaemia also, and had stomach feeds and he is always in and out of hospital, while two others have mental health issues due to their ADHD and social anxiety. Which leaves my eldest daughter who has allergies and since developed depression and fatigue.

I know, I was sentenced to prison but whatever it is; my children and I have paid the price and maybe, never ever to forget that episode. I have since developed instability which has made my mental health and physical health worsen.

Detention centre here in Bedford called Yarl’s Wood is not fit for purpose, my mobility, my legs has been so swollen that I was rushed to Bedford hospital for suppected DVT, and immediately put on blood-clot-prevention-injection called warfarin, but since then nothing has been done. And I am on self-catheterisation which has been given by the hospital consultant and I am due for an operation due to my bladder problem, which is continuing. I am on tena pads which are not supplied by the centre, which I have to go to the welfare people to help get it for me. All these people can do is to get me few at a time. It is very embarrassing; my medication have been changed and down graded because healthcare can’t afford them, and the meds given are generic, as I was meant to understand.

I am also a victim of rape, what more can I give; my blood from my lifeless body as my mental health has become a real concern, even for the mental health team; I am on antidepressant. I am in a tight corner and the only solution persisting in my thought; is SUICIDE for me? But my children will probably want to do same. I can bear that thought.

I have been in detention for 8 months without any plan of what is next. The Home Office keep saying they are still trying to get emergency travel document to send me back to my torturers and to the country I no longer belong, I have not one family member there, after living in the UK for 33 years. My children are all alone without any help from the authority and they never been or ever want to be part of that country that I’m being forced to go.

HELP my family. I have my family, cousins, nieces/nephews here in the UK and Church family too. I don’t know anyone in Africa.

Once again, I thank you and I congratulate you on your sincere, competence and humanly concerns for detainees, especially solidarity to living a better world.

I feel I am being threatened and patronised because of the protest

Yarls Wood IRC
Bedford

On the 2/3/18, I was summoned to the Legal Home Office department to meet the Immigration Enforcement Manager Fiona Quaynor, I met her in the presence of her teammate (another) home office officer. I do not recall his name but he is Indian.

I was told by Fiona I am going to be interviewed by them especially because I am on the hunger strike protest in Yarl’s Wood over Home Office injustices and unfairness. They asked me if I was fit to do the interview to which I replied it’s ok we can proceed. Fiona explained to me that the interview was being done because I had refused food and fluids and that it was Home Office procedure to carry out the interview.

The interview kicked off and a number of questions were asked:

  • Why was I hunger striking?
  • What are my demands
  • Do I have a solicitor, etc.

After answering the questions, Fiona read out to me what I considered conditions or repercussions of me being on hunger strike and asked me if I understood what she was reading out.

I was reassured that because I was on hunger strike it didn’t mean that;

  • My case would be favoured, it will take its due course
  • It will not lead to me being granted permission to stay in the UK
  • That it didn’t mean that my removal directions would be deferred
  • That it will not lead to the progress of my immigration or Asylum case being altered or delayed
  • That it will not lead to me being released.

To mention but a few, above is what I remember.

I am very upset till today that I feel I am being threatened and patronised because of the protest. It made me feel very upset, distressed and I feel sad and depressed that indirectly we/I am being punished for hunger striking and protesting. What happened to human rights, freedom of speech and expression? Should we just keep quiet when we are not happy and pretend like everything is alright?

Is it because I am a prisoner that cannot speak out and air out my opinions and views? Is this how Britain welcomes immigrants? This is very unfair to us and I hope one day that this country, Home Office and government will protect vulnerable immigrants and refugees.

All I need is to be safe from my pursuits from my family in Uganda, it has not been a safe journey in my life especially since coming out that I am gay, but now I feel I am being punished by the one country that should give me protection. I cannot return to my country for fear of my life, it’s one of the top countries that prosecute LGBTQ people.

I am already feeling scared, frightened and I am always under the weather for being rejected by my husband’s family, community, workmates and friends. I fear for my dear life on a daily.

So trying to patronise me because I am protesting for a change that directly affects makes me feel even more anxious and angry every day.

In most questions, I told the Home Office they have a right to do whatever they want to do because I cannot control them and neither do I make their policies. I just pray for fairness and justice to prevail when it comes to my case. I lean on the hope in God that never disappoints. Only God knows destiny, no man can change what God has planned for me.

No matter what happens, let me be remembered as a Uganda Detainee that was fighting for the vulnerable and mistreated asylum seekers.

One day we shall all rest and leave this wicked world, God is in charge of our lives, Home Office can decide and throw us back in the den of lions but God shall save us.

In Healthcare, I was asked to sign a document that take away the duty of care of my health from Healthcare.

The Doctor asked me to sign so Healthcare doesn’t have to be liable for my health.

“In case any health hazard happens to you, maybe you faint or at the verge of death, if you can sign the document, we shall not touch you.”  In other words, I will have to die and healthcare, Serco and Home Office will not be liable. I refused to sign. Where is the humanity and compassion from these people that are meant to take care of us. It’s ridiculous and very frustrating.

Currently I am still on hunger strike and eating snow as I feel that’s all I want to eat right now. I am angry I feel I am not wanted in this country, let the Home Office and the Home Secretary kill me here in the UK, than returning me to a death trap in Uganda.

 

They have not accepted my wife in this country.

I’m a British citizen & we have been married almost 6 years. And she was on the signing, daily reporting, monthly reporting. They detained her. They’re saying that she has overstayed and that she must claim asylum. She wasn’t overstayed at all.

I am suffering from epilepsy.

We have been married since July, 2012. And we were living together before.

In October when she was reporting. The issue they took was in November. They cancel the ticket.

They put her case to judicial review. The application has been accepted.

The letter they are giving me now, says we are not married at all. That she has no right to stay in this country.

We are suffering in our married life. I have a physical disability. And the Home Office is not accepting at all that this is a general marriage. I have got all statements from the Home Office & they said they can report anytime. They have not accepted my wife in this country. They said I can go & settle with life in India. I’m here since 1980 from a very young age & now I have no family relation over there – no brothers or sisters & my parents are no longer.

The Home Office saying to me I can go back to India with my wife because she is an Indian national.

I came to this country 15 years ago. I have 2 children here.

I came to this country 15 years ago. I have 2 children here. I had just been to visit my family in Brazil and on my way back I was detained in Pembroke for one week, and then moved here, to Yarl’s Wood.

In here you have to stay in one room. You can only go out to eat, which is twice a day. You can’t go out or speak on the phone properly as people are always listening. Plenty of the girls here do not speak to their family and cannot afford to buy food.

You can’t have family visit because for them to come here you have to make an appointment and for some this is very difficult. And there is no way for you to see your child.

Some girls are here for 2 years and don’t move. Only to eat. 4 girls here have mental conditions.

Please help these people.

It is horrible here.

Some don’t speak very good English. People search your bag when you arrive. You can bring only pants, no clothes here.

It is like a prison.

The food here is horrible. No dogs would eat it.

It’s very cold here.

There is one room for two girls. Plus, some girls have bad health. No one comes to help them as they can’t speak English.

Some girls don’t have money to eat, and they aren’t able to get in touch with family. Some girls here don’t know how to get a solicitor and don’t have money so can’t access help.

We are being controlled by officers for 24 hours. Controlled. Everything is controlled.

Inside the detention centre you don’t feel you have any rights

Inside the detention centre you don’t feel you have any rights. They keep telling us we need to go back to our country. Everyone needs to be aware of this because they detain people unlawfully – maybe some people are detained for some reason like crime – but I was reporting for 2 years regularly but they still detained me. What’s the point of that? I was applying for a visa, paying the money. I try to see a doctor and they tell me I’m not entitled to see a doctor! There are people struggling health issues. They tell us that we are just pretending to be ill, why would we do that? In this country I believe that everyone is entitled to see a doctor, especially if the state is detaining you.

I was here in this country for 9 years, and then this ruined everything. I can’t socialise and do anything.

I agree with every single condition that they offer for my visa application but then they still detain me.

I have been here for 4 months, some people for 6 months. Of course some people get let out after a few weeks but then they come back again. If you want to bring them again here then why give them bail and then bring them back.

I wish when I get out and I get a good job that I will be able to do something about this because it is wrong.

For someone like me that they cannot deport, why am I still here? Why do they play that game?

The reason I am here is because of a mistake in identity. And, well, the HO had me mistaken with someone else and the because of that I have been detained for 9 months. They tried to deport me once to Mauritius, because the document wasn’t right the airport wouldn’t put me on the plane. Then the Mauritian embassy said the HO cannot use that document any more because they don’t believe I am from there country. I am telling the HO for 1,5 years that my name is different, the reason why I haven’t said it before, unfortunately I went in prison, I do admit I made a mistake, I went on with the wrong crowd, when I realised things were not right, and tried to get out there were starting to threaten me, and threaten my partner. And my good friends, they were trying to find out where I live and make lots of threats. I got hit a couple of times, it was quite severe. In the end, I plead guilty. I kind of, I was the only one whose gone to prison. So then, because that, I couldn’t tell anyone, I couldn’t even defend myself. I became clinically depressed, my anorexia kicked in again and I was sectioned. All that pressure. And I was in the psychiatric ward, it became too much. But, so that is the reason why at the time , I told them, I always told them all the way, that I have never said that I am that Mauritian women. It has nothing to do with me, the document was found, but it doesn’t even have my picture. They couldn’t found out who I was , so they said I am that woman. I didn’t know what to do. To an extent I accept that responsibility, it became a nightmare, it is also partly my fault. If I had said it at the time, but then either I get hurt or people I love get hurt, I had to chose and I chose to protect people that I love. But now it created a lot of confusion and a lot of issues, but still I had , I

have a biological sister in Liberia, we were estranged for quite some time, more than 12 years we have got back together, my friend found here. We got back talking. When all of this happened she started helping me to get my documents together. I left Liberia at the age of 7, I was adopted by a British family. I don’t think I was legally adopted, I mean that was the 70s in Liberia, you could just take children, I was an orphan. My biological mum died, and I was left with no one. My sisters dad didn’t want to take me on. What I became after was not good, they were homophobic. They were diplomats so I moved around with them. I had 4 other siblings, all adopted from African backgrounds. I got a good education. That’s all I know about my biological side, and my sister doesn’t know much either. I was too young.

When my adopted family, when I was 16, we were posted to Morocco. I sent a letter to another female, how I felt and it was intercepted by one of the nannies and I got beaten. It was very regimental, very strict, we were home schooled. The beating were proper beatings, like awful punishment. I couldn’t move, it was a nightmare. So when I turned 18 a friend of mine from Sierra Leone to run away from them. We went to South Africa and he got me a job there. For a couple of years and then things started to be a bit better, I still had severe nightmares. But then he said they are getting closer and they will find me, and I was told that I belong to them, I was adopted and they give me anything, I am just an object.

It was an outrage, they said I was not a normality, I was defective, they said its not normal to like women, it doesn’t make sense. When he said they are getting closer, he said we better run away. Then we ran away to Kenya. They were British. We never saw the documents, where we used to go. But they never brought us to Britain, so that’s why I got to think why I was not legally adopted, because we never came here.

My friend said he knew someone who help people to cross over, so this is what we have done. I was working, in a call centre and stuff like that. I had to give some money to my friend who was helping me, to pay the agent. It took a couple of years to cross and come over here. And in between I was abused by that agent and it got on me really bad. I just tried to pretend it didn’t happen and brush it off. So when I get ill, it gets really to me. I just get on with things and then throughout the years I got a really anxious person, that is connected to the food disorder, I get really anxious and cant eat and get really depressed and its that sort of cycle that I cant break. I never got any help for what I went through. All the nightmares I get, they get worse when I am unwell. I can deal with things.

I came over here we landed in Dover, we drove. Through France. The agent gave me to someone else and was like, and there was another female. We had to go with that guy. I don’t want to mention his name, because I think he still lives in White City, and I don’t want to get in trouble. He took us to his place and I got a so called job, a topless bar in Soho . Thats pretty much my life, I was abused many times, we had part of it, there was nowhere to go, we were new in the country. So we where there for some time, we made a couple of friends, one friend she helped us to get away from it.

We were new in the country, so we had nowhere to go. My friend never said I should claim asylum, but that is what I should have done at the time, but we were never guided, we were underground and we had to be careful. You found a job and you worked cash in hand, someone says you are a hard worker and that’s how I lived for 20 years. I worked at a florist shop, I was in shared accommodation, it went on like that. I worked for a Launderette some time. It was different back then. I met some nice people that I am still friends with today.

Then only this one group. In the beginning he was kind of okay, only until a couple of years later. Over here I had a couple of female partners, before I got with this guy. I went out with A for a couple of years, we lived together. I had unresolved issues of the past and I found it difficult to speak to her about it and it was still hurting me. So, I had couple of female partners. It wasn’t until a few years later, we were going out and you know, for 2,5 years. I met D in 2001, a few months later we had a sling. When I left S, then I was with him. I was in a good place, he liked me. I got a job, he helped me. I felt lucky, he didn’t ask me for any document, I never thought anything was wrong. So it kind of, you know. So many things happened in my life.

I found it quite difficult, when I realised things were not right with this lot, he knew a lot of people, he had people in the police, I had no way, even if I wanted to go to the authorities. I didn’t know what to do, I wanted to protect him. He didn’t know something was wrong, and I distanced myself from other friends, because I didn’t want them to get into trouble. It became an absolute nightmare and no where I am today. I got arrested, I became ill, I got a hefty sentence. There was a lack of defence, I wasn’t well. The anxiety was at a a high level, I was at a very dark place. I didn’t know what to do. He had contacts with the police force, so then I thought where do I go? I couldn’t even go to the authorities. Where I was at I was vulnerable, and I didn’t know what to do. And then it all happened, once I got to the half of my sentence I got moved to Yarl’s Wood and they tried to deport me. All the solicitors , all the accountants everyone got away, it was all on my shoulders. His contacts are helping it, it was all put on my shoulders. If things get resolved, everyone reading the story, they will think its not possible for all this lot to get away. But I plead guilty, so there was no way out, I had no choice. Even the solicitors after, they said they cannot believe I pleaded guilty that this was the possibility, and yet it happened. It was too late and my credibility was gone and they would all hide behind my guilty plead. You could see that I couldn’t have done that alone, but unfortunately it happened the way it happened.

People need to know about detention, I think no one should be in detention. This is not a nice place, people are treated like numbers, the healthcare is crap, this is like a prison. Its really crap. You haven’t got any, you know, people are tricked. They try to trick people to do things they don’t want to do. A lot of the women here don’t understand what the officers are saying, many here don’t speak English well, so they use that against them. They scare them, and say that not right your case, they trick them to get sectioned. They do dirty tricks. They are just moppets of the home office, that is what goes on. My personal experience, you have no access to social media, we don’t have access to sites like yours, things that could help detainees, that is limited. I cant access it. We don’t have access to Free Movement, so many pages, we cant see the case law, cases to do with detention or immigration , we cant use face book, it makes it more difficult to communicate with people on the outside. It is an absolute disaster, the food is bad I am not catered for, it is all stodgy.

There is no care here, it is run by G4S and they are run by the HO. They don’t think about peoples health, I filed numerous complaints. My own solicitors, they had a look at all my medical records and said this is an outrage . I am not being treated that what I have been diagnosed with in the past, only for a few weeks I have been treated for illness in my stomach. I cannot eat at all, food repulses me, they give me a cocktail of medication, all in all 600 calories. I feel weak, I still drink, years when I was sectioned, I couldn’t drink then. Now I can drink, I am still down and its not easy. Its a big effort. My foot is swollen, I have pins and needles. Now they are telling me I have to wait for 4 days to see a doctor. I cant walk, I don’t know what they are waiting for.

There is no duty of care in the detention system, really really not good. For someone like me that they cannot deport, why am I still here? Why do they play that game that they give me a monthly report, its some kind of game, I don’t know. Absolutely out of order. If you got a bail hearing coming up, even if they know they cant put you on a plane, they give you tickets.

If they take me back to Ghana I will kill myself.

I came to this country in 1999, to be with my brother and my sister. I have a wife here. I have been in this country for almost 18 years.In 2012 I applied as an over-stayer. The Home Office didn’t respond. Nothing. I waited. I checked with my solicitor and they still have no response from the Home Office. I reported my situation to my MP in Peckham, London, they wrote the Home Office for me. They said they had spoken to the Home Office, but still I heard nothing back from them. I waited another 2 months and went again to my MP. Again they wrote to them. Still I heard nothing, In 2015, 3 years later, the Home Office wrote to me saying I had been refused. Why? I have been here long time, I have family here.

After I was refused the home Office told me to report at the immigration centre every 2 weeks. I did this. One day I didn’t go to report, because my sister had passed away in Birmingham. I wrote to them to tell them I would miss one week. The Home Office was not OK with this. They called me and told me to go to the immigration centre in Croydon. I went to Croydon and they interviewed me for a long time. After the interview they gave me a ticket to go back to Ghana for THAT night, at 10pm. I went with them to the airport, though I had no money and non of my things with me. The officer offered my £20 to return to Ghana with- are they insulting me?! I cannot return to a place I haven’t been for 15 years with £20. My ticket for the flight was cancelled. But I was not released, instead they took my to the detention centre.

The way they are treating us is in the detention centre is very, very bad. The toilets haven’t been cleaned for over a week- they are disgusting. The food is very bad. They know the food is not good. Last night they just gave me bread and rice, no sauce, nothing. When you go to the healthcare here- you have to queue for over 1 hour, just for painkillers.

On Wednesday they give me another ticket to Ghana. Now they have given me a ticket for the charter flight next week.

What do the they expect me to do? They are trying to deport me when I don’t have one penny in my pocket. How can I leave me wife in this country? How can I leave my brother and his children in this country? My family and my life is here in the UK. If they take me back to Ghana I will kill myself.

I have been in this country for almost 18 years. I have applied for asylum because I am not safe to go back there. The Home Office know this, I have given them all of my evidence. I have no criminal record, no contact with the police. Just the Home Office making problems. The Home Office don’t respect me. They don’t listen to me. They don’t listen to my wife. It is not OK to treat people like this.

The Home Office don’t follow the laws of this country. We all follow the law, but they don’t. It is not fair.

Human life is more important than immigration status…. We need you to help us stop the charter planes.

Here in Harmondsworth people are being maltreated. I am diabetic, and I complained that the food is not good for my health. I have a Kidney problem. I complain several times. But up to now nothing is being done. I found a lump, but when I went to the doctor in the detention centre, they were angry. They do not listen. The doctor told me it is just fat. But now, they do tests and they discover it is a lump. Our lives are not important to the people working in the detention centres, or the Home Office. It is not good for the UK to be like this.

When you have insecure immigration status, you don’t have life. Your life is not considered important. It should not be like this. Human life is more important than immigration status.

We need the government to come and talk to the detainees. There are lots of secret here.

The people that they deport, and put on the charter flights. Those people loose their lives. Everything gets worse for them. It is not good.

Some people have been in the UK for 10 or 12 years, then picked up and sent back. When they go back, they have nothing to live on. We must do something about it. We are speaking to people back home, in the churches, to raise money to help the people. But the Home Office is making life more difficult. When you have no criminal record and have stayed in the UK for long time – you should not be deported.

We need you to help us stop the charter planes.

They are detaining people for as long as they want, which is totally illegal and disproportionate

I am a victim of torture and the Home Office says a victim of torture should never be detained, if it confirmed by the medical practitioner in detention. I am a level 3 indicator rest, which makes me too vulnerable to be in detention. And right now, I have a case pending, and I am preparing for my bail at the moment. And I hope it will be a positive outcome as soon as possible. I think the Home Office is really not following their policy at all, in the sense that they are going to make up a policy and they are not following it. Which is affecting a lot of people in detention centre, vulnerable people in detention. They are detaining people for as long as they want, which is totally illegal and disproportionate.

Now my case is on judicial review in the high court for unlawful detention, they already filed the judicial review. Because I have been detained for more than 6 months and I am waiting for the positive outcome. I am suing the home office. Yet they are not releasing me. So I recently arranged to see doctor here in the centre. And I explained to him about my mental state, my mental heath. And I explained everything to him, low mood, agitation, loss of weight, lack of concentration and so on. He told me that he is going to forward the message to the HO, so they can review my case, that was last Thursday, 3 days ago. He told me he will forward the message, because I am totally unfit for detention .

Even people, some of my friends, they got a report from the doctor in December and they got release. I don’t what criteria they use to release people under rule 35. Some friends got released under that rule , but I didn’t, so don’t know. Some of them did commit a crime, they were on temporary admission and they didn’t comply. But for me I never committed any crime in the UK and I complied when I got temporary admission before I got detained. I was on temporary admission before I was in detention, I reported regularly in lunar house every two weeks. I was always complying with that. But now I have been in detention for more than 6 months, and I am a vulnerable who can be harmed through detention. The horrible part of it is when I call the Home Office, and ask for my caseworker they say I don’t have a caseworker. So anyone can open my file and write something about me. I called a couple of time, to ask for my caseworker. I have been seeing different people, the next month I see another case worker.

The system is just totally shit man. My case is better than other peoples who committed crimes and didn’t comply to the temporary admission conditions and then they are just in detention for 2 or 3 months. I have two cases pending and it is going take a lot of time, no one knows how long its going to take. So I think they should release me while I am waiting. Everyone needs their liberty.

Instead of bringing me to the hospital, they are making excuses. They don’t bring me to the hospital to see the specialists

Its really hard, because its like 4 months I am here and I feel like more than 4 years. My life, I have lot of personal problems, I have been here and I cannot get any treatments. Even the doctor has said to me it is about my mind. It is hard to get treatment, its lot of people every day people are coming. You have to share the room with people. Its very complicated because I have health problems, I have ear infections for years and years and many other problems.

When I was outside it was not a big things, first thing when I was outside I was going to the doctor, they made me a surgery. I was supposed to go to a surgery in October, I got paperwork about that, I provided everything to the healthcare in the detention centre. They cancelled it, they said its too hard to take me out from here. They said they arrange another appointment.

The food is really bad, I cant eat everything , the toilets are really dirty. It is really hard and I am getting lost and lost. It has been 4 months since they cancelled. What happened it is really not fair. You know the doctor gave me 4 different kinds of antibiotics, very powerful. Instead of bringing me to the hospital, they are making excuses. They don’t bring me to the hospital to see the specialists.

I said to the doctor, I showed it to the doctor outside, 4 different antibiotics in 2 weeks. He said this can only be done through an operation. I may loose my hearing. Something comes out of my ear, I have to wash my sheets every second day. Its very embarrassing. They try to solve it with tablets. He said he will refer me to the specialist. I am just going down with my mental problems, I am seeing the psychologist every week. Even the psychologist said it will not end very soon. I say just release me , it will be a quick fix. I haven’t talked to my parents for 2 months, I haven’t talked to my family for 2 months. I can’t find them anymore. I am scared.

They treat us like animals, what do we have? In the end of the day we are losers, I am happy that I still survive. I don’t know when I am going to go out, its like hell over here. I will definitely help everybody who is in the detention centre when I get out. I know how hard it is for people here, waiting in the queue for half an hour to get two paracetamol. I got flu, I got cold, I got cancer, I got pain in my leg, they just give you paracetamol. It is really hard for me, I feel like my future is getting spoiled. I thought I will live 100 years, but I don’t see my future from here. I got loads of problems back home, I am scared all of the time, am I going to be tortured, am I going be dead. I am not saying, just accept my case straight away. I know it takes time to go through my case, but I am spoiling every second every minute , but just release me, I will not run away, I am fearing my life, I will not go back home.

I have friends outside, it is a waste of time in here. Everything is not gonna be solved, my skin is going weird, one of the nurses said it is because of the water here. What can I do? Should I stop taking shower? I go every two weeks to the doctor, I say tell the home office. So many people say so many different kind of things. But at the end of the day I have to my body with that waters. One of my friends, he sent him back now, he had the same problem. After taking shower, he had red marks on his body. Mine is kind of, like a rash , in the morning when I wake up, it really hurts. I have been getting them on my hand, on my feet. I heard lots of people saying here, you can get a very itchy body, very dry body. You just press the button for the shower and the water comes. You have no choice. I had a problem under my foot and I cant wear shoes. At the end of the day I am in big problems. It is not fair. The officer just try to let go everything and make excuses. And we just wait for weeks and months and it may go on for years. I just pray for God that I don’t live for long, things are getting worse over here. Otherwise I should go mental. I just think its better to go mental, then they would release me. It is very complicated. For my appeal hearing I tried to adjourn it until I am fit enough until I can concentrate properly, its my life, you know. But they refused, I couldn’t really concentrate because of the pain. It was really bad the hearing. It is not really fair, the people over here they know what needs to be done. Before my hearing, my solicitor sent a letter to the health care over here in the centre and made a request to write a letter to say that I am not fit enough to go to the hearing. After the appeal hearing they health care replied and said I am not fit enough. But it was too late, they are playing with my life.